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Socializing Alone vs. With Friends

By Aaron Tanner

· introvert,aspergers,Socializing,Friends,alone

Over the past couple of months, I had the opportunity to do social events with friends as well as social events by myself. In fact, I am supposed to have lunch with a friend after church this Sunday.

The most significant social event was going to an Atlanta Braves baseball game with some friends. A week earlier, I visited the National Cornbread Festival by myself. Also, I met a friend at his house, and we hung out together, and I went to the Cory Pesaturo accordion concert alone.

Although I agree that attending a social event is more fun with friends, it is not the end of the world if I wind up doing something without a companion or I spend the weekend in my room reading books. I am not afraid of eating at a restaurant or going to the gym by myself.

As an introvert, I do not understand people who feel that they must always go with someone else to a social event or else they will not attend. Although I enjoy one on one social interaction, doing something with large groups of people, such as a party, are incredibly draining.

Because I need a lot of downtime after social interactions, I am hesitant to get into a romantic relationship as I hear the amount of work that goes into it is very high. Most people with Aspergers need an extended amount of time to cool off after social interactions as being around other people can be chaotic.

Doing things alone allows me to set my schedule and do the things that I want to do. I agree that too much alone time can be negative whether one has Aspergers or not. However, I can go several weekends without social interaction, and it does not upset me. Asking a friend if they want to hang out and do something takes effort, which does not come easy for me.

I believe people need not be afraid of being in their own company and reflect on who they are and what they want in life. It is okay to entertain oneself and not expect someone to do all the work in making sure you are not bored. Like I have discovered when I’m on my schedule, you might strike up an interesting conversation with a stranger instead of being absorbed by the conversation with your friend or partner.

Although I am grateful for my friends and the social opportunities that arise, I am also equally thankful that I am courageous enough to try new things by myself.

Do you prefer going out with friends to social gatherings or do you prefer your own company? Comment in the section below.

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